Friday, June 29, 2012

hold me, I'm scared

HOLD ME, I’M SCARED
There is no end of climate change doomers out there.  You’d think that survivalists would eagerly embrace another possible way for the world to end but it seems most of us look at the Gore Warmers as Berkenstock wearing tree hugging commie tea drinking twats.  Myself amongst those detractors.  One of the few climate doomer survivalists is the freeze dried food guy over at Survival Acres.  And I’ve always taken his eminent demise wailings with a huge grain of salt.  Just as you’ve all scoffed at my Peak Oil panic over the years.  But this morning I stumbled on to the article at Survival Acres that linked to Guy McPherson.
and the original
Perhaps after yesterday’s anal violation by the First Kenyan I was open mentally to any suggestion, being mentally battered and traumatized.  But I couldn’t help but be a new kind of very worried as I read up the latest by Guy ( who I respect ) on how the tripping points into extinction level events were already surpassed, only being slowed by the continued burning of petroleum.  Now, I don’t buy into the whole thing.  While I’ve read that a single airplane trip uses more energy than all the calories burned to erect the Great Pyramid ( or, it could have been that figure was transporting a single passenger- I can’t remember exactly ), so I suppose that our daily fleet of planes could theoretically really impose quite an effect on the atmosphere, I still have a hard time believing that those plane trips alone are keeping the climate from warming up to ocean acidification levels in a mere few days ( the article was saying that the contrails were deflecting heat back out ).  I’m not saying I’m right, just that I have a hard time believing it.  I’m not heavily into science and don’t have the background to judge. 
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And while I might not buy into the whole “doomed by climate in the next few years”, I am certainly pausing to think about it.  It isn’t that we’ve had freak events like that three feet of hailstorm.  Those weird things can always happen.  It is more like the unrelenting string of ever new freak events that pile on top of each other.  The American West has had 500 Year Events before as far as drought ( the Anasazi and further south the Mayan civilization collapses ).  Texas and New Mexico have had mega-fires before ( they might be worse now but only because of manmade unnatural suppression in past years ).  No, what stands out to me is the unstopping global weirdness.  You’ve got to be thinking something is up wid dat, homie.  And yet, just the weather isn’t my only concern.  The weather is just the latest in a long line of potential life altering events that are piling up and waiting to realign in a Perfect Storm.  Politically, I’d wager the divide between federal dictatorship and freemen has never been greater than since the War Of Northern Aggression.  We’ve had generations of encroachment on our freedoms.  From the end of precious metal as money to the military draft to the Commerce Clause to the Cold War and the Red Scare to the War On Drugs to the War On Terror.  Every generation it gets worse and worse and I can’t help but wonder if the ObammaCare BS isn’t a tripping point for those that have so far held back wishing to reestablish Constitutional government.  The new ruling no longer punishes you for earning money but punishes you if you don’t pay money regardless of your financial position ( on the news today- Romney says if elected he will repeal AND REPLACE ObammyCare.  Notice he is just replacing it with RomneyCare ).  It also establishes that the government can now force you to eat broccoli ( a reference to the Bush One discussion on eating that putrid swill ).
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Financially, it is merely a question of when not if the derivatives mess explodes.  When you try to get rich on gambling and you loose, then you gamble some more to try to stop the lose or keep the mob from breaking your kneecaps, it usually ends badly.  The banks got rich on derivatives, then lost their ass and are now gambling with yet more derivatives ( JP Morgan now up to nine billion and counting in loses ) while trying to get government to bail them out.  But when you are playing a leveraging game that equals ten times the global economy and you then lose just a small fraction of that, there isn’t enough credit and money in existence to cover those loses.  That is what we are waiting for financially.  Europe is all fine and dandy for theatre, but the whole global economy is waiting to fail. 
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Weather wise, politically and financially we seem to be in a lot of trouble.  Now add in the two much bigger problems of exploding population and dwindling resources, both of which will alter in characteristic with  any downturn in the economy, a continuing drought worldwide or political turmoil of the policeman protecting what is left of global trade, or a combination of more than one of the above.  In short, that perfect storm.  We can’t predict when, so it is best to get ready now.  I for one am getting a very sharp pain in my gut.  Despite my assurances I feel ready for whatever comes along, at this time I’m getting a voice yelling at me to go crazy on more wheat ( weather change and stored food will be IT for your food supply ) and ammo ( zombie fighting ) and build the damn BPOD ( Bison Pit Of Doom ) immediately if not sooner before commerce disruption ( say, in civil war and travel restrictions ).  I’ve panicked before, so who knows.  Still…
END
NEW Bison Blog CD For Sale
I've got an actual professional to archieve and format all the old blog on a CD-ROM.  I haven't got a copy of it yet, but I'm thinking this thing will be better than sliced white bread.   It does cost $10 plus shipping, figure another $4 or so, which might be a bit on the higher side.  But I think I'm worth it.  Depending on how much the production company charges per copy, my cut will be about $5 to $6.  That isn't too much to ask for over five years of work and nearly two million words of pure brilliance.  Here is the link to order:
http://kunaki.com/sales.asp?PID=PX00KX7Z1I
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Please support Bison by buying through the Amazon graphics above and to the right of each article.  Or, visit
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You can purchase anything, not just the linked item.  Enter Amazon through my item link and then go to whatever other item you desire.  As long as you don’t leave Amazon until after the order is placed, I get credit for your purchase.  Thank you.
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By the by, all my writing is copyrighted.  For the obtuse out there.

Thursday, June 28, 2012

obammy shoves it up my ass

OBAMMY SHOVES IT UP MY ASS
I really had something else planned for today’s article but an hour ago as I’m picking up more sloppy seconds to feed the bums I notice on the TV playing in the dining area “individual mandate upheld”.  This of course must be commented on if for no other reason than my blood pressure is through the roof and I’m pretty damn pissed right now.  I of course knew that the ObammyCare would be law one day.  I’ve been harping on this for months.  And I’ve said that even if that plastic prick Romney was elected we would still have mandatory health care.  He might or might not be lying ( claiming he will abolish if elected )  but most likely what will happen is he will make a few cosmetic changes and in the end we still get some form of mandated insurance.  He did it when he was governor and there is no reason to believe he won’t do it as Prez.  Of course, all these little Socialist humps have the same sheet of music they play from.  They have pricks like Rush harping on the same thing.  Welfare people cost us money.  No welfare!  Bad, bad welfare pukes!  In their eyes, if you go to the emergency room and don’t have cash to pay for a life threatening ailment you are breaking the treasury of the US.  Forget the fact that all the welfare programs in this country ( except retirement or old fart medical ) don’t come close to the cost of the civil servants administering all welfare programs.  Or what corporate welfare costs.  And don’t get me started on the bankers welfare which trumps all other costs.  No, if you fail to pay your $300 hospital bill you are forcing this country into bankruptcy.
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Now, the last time my wife went to the ER about two months ago the total bill for everything was about four hundred bucks.  Sure, I’m making payments rather than paying it all at once, but I’m paying it along with the ambulance.  I am not free loading off other more affluent patients.  Yet, according to the logic of the Supreme Court, Obammy the first Kenyan and quite possibly the Ken Doll Romney ( who I hope has his God consign to Hell where he shall sauna in a bubbling pool of feces for all eternity while getting lava enemas ) I pose a threat to paying hospital guests and so I must be punished just in case.  My tax bill must increase FIFTY HUMPING PERCENT so that the mule member suckling politicians of both parties can repay their banker bosses for their election ( the insurance industry bail out will benefit mostly-who else?- the bankers ).  This is the same logic that made auto insurance mandatory.  That punishes you for not wearing a seat belt or motorcycle helmet or talking on the cell phone in the car or drinking too much soda or having anything fried in trans fat.  You are being taxed JUST IN CASE.   I won’t even get started on how this in un-Constitutional.  That ship sailed during the War Between The States and the last vestiges of that document were burned with great pomp and ceremony as it was decided any citizen could be held indefinitely without trial.  Don’t think I’m not pissed about all that.  I am.  But my point today is that we have now opened the door for unlimited increased taxation.  At least before we could hide, or opt out or hedge our bets or somehow evade the worst of it.  But now, you are being penalized for daring to breath.
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Everybody gets screwed.  Here’s some figures:
Scroll down a bit to use the calculator to see your new tax bill.  On minimum wage with the wife not working I get to pay an additional $1400 a year in either health insurance or fees.  You are forced to buy.  If you earn under X amount, congrats.  You are eligible for an expanded form of Medicare ( or Medicaid, I forget which ).  Ah, but even if you are eligible doesn’t mean it will be available.  The Court has ruled that states can opt out of the new expanded coverage.  Hence, no state will participate as all are broke already.  I don’t have any information on those unemployed, but I can guess they fall under the same Catch-22 of Medicare eligibility but not coverage.  Get ready to support those in your family not working to the tune of $500-$600 a year each.  Now, if this was National Health Care I wouldn’t care quite so much.  At least I get health care. But this is merely compulsory private insurance.  Anyone who has had a claim on their car insurance knows how that coverage is less insurance than it is just a mandatory bride to drive.  I imagine the same will be true of the medical insurance.  Just because the cap is in place for deductibles ( 8% of income, which is on top of the initial insurance, so now your 10% additional tax almost doubles to  18% which added to a minimum of 20% federal taxes means you just got a doubling on your taxes.  If you DON’T use your insurance you get a fifty percent tax increase.  Use the coverage and your taxes double ) doesn’t mean you get treatment. 
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Remember, this is private coverage.  If your insurance company won’t pay above X amount for a service such as an X-Ray, that other private practice providing the x-ray closes shop.  You CAN get an x-ray.  If you travel three towns over and wait five months since there is a back log.  And how do you do that with no car ( you can’t afford both insurances ) or with gas at $10 a gallon ( either Peak Oil or new carbon taxes ).  The new law is just a tax increase.  It is not insurance.  Friggin ass whore mother humpers.
END
NEW Bison Blog CD For Sale
I've got an actual professional to archieve and format all the old blog on a CD-ROM.  I haven't got a copy of it yet, but I'm thinking this thing will be better than sliced white bread.   It does cost $10 plus shipping, figure another $4 or so, which might be a bit on the higher side.  But I think I'm worth it.  Depending on how much the production company charges per copy, my cut will be about $5 to $6.  That isn't too much to ask for over five years of work and nearly two million words of pure brilliance.  Here is the link to order:
http://kunaki.com/sales.asp?PID=PX00KX7Z1I
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Please support Bison by buying through the Amazon graphics above and to the right of each article.  Or, visit
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You can purchase anything, not just the linked item.  Enter Amazon through my item link and then go to whatever other item you desire.  As long as you don’t leave Amazon until after the order is placed, I get credit for your purchase.  Thank you.
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By the by, all my writing is copyrighted.  For the obtuse out there.

Wednesday, June 27, 2012

trailer cubed

TRAILER CUBED
Due to a couple of loyal minions whispering sweet nothings into my ear, unduly influencing my pliable and suggestible mind, today’s topic is more than one travel trailer for forming a housing unit.  That’s right, before I talked about living in a single travel trailer and today I arrive at the brilliant thought that if one is good two is better.  I have cubed my brilliance and once again present pure wisdom in mere human form ( but, again, be advised if you don’t like the idea it wasn’t mine at all.  No guarantees implicit or implied ).  A single travel trailer ( used only I wouldn’t think it needs to be added because new ones are just like cars in that they are bloated in retail price and immediately lose value driving off the lot.  At one time we could blame the Union level wages of the guys assembling them but those days are over.  The humping RV companies aren’t paying but a fraction what they used to, kind of like with butchers or construction workers- thank you Mexican immigrants- and all those inflated profits are theirs. Well, mostly the Gott Damn Bankers that loaned them money to buy each other out, consolidating until all future earnings went to interest paid on Monopoly money ) is nice enough, but there are space restraints. 
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NEW Bison Blog CD For Sale
I've got an actual professional to archieve and format all the old blog on a CD-ROM.  I haven't got a copy of it yet, but I'm thinking this thing will be better than sliced white bread.   It does cost $10 plus shipping, figure another $4 or so, which might be a bit on the higher side.  But I think I'm worth it.  Depending on how much the production company charges per copy, my cut will be about $5 to $6.  That isn't too much to ask for over five years of work and nearly two million words of pure brilliance.  Here is the link to order:
http://kunaki.com/sales.asp?PID=PX00KX7Z1I
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As a married couple of short duration, a single trailer might be nice and cozy, each time the two of you rub up against each other to get through the isle way  you touch naughty parts and get all frisky and start copulating without further thought.  But that behavior begets your spawn and before you know it there are one or two too many people in the trailer.  The answer erroneously arrived at for many generations is to buy a mobile home with its ten to thirty year mortgage.  They look like a house and feel like a house but unless you live in Florida where cheap mobiles belonging to dead retired people sprout like kudzu they also cost almost like a house.  If the former trailer dwelling couple are total idiots and don’t deserve to reproduce they either buy a regular house or worst of all go rent an apartment.  The better by far answer to those that avoid debt as if it were a communicable disease is to just buy a second trailer.  As you will see in a second, they have already paid for the house by a third ( for our discussion here we avoid real estate costs or zoning problems ) so the first trailer becomes an investment rather than an expense.
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If you take two to four trailers and join them up, and further more use the joining member as a communal living area and insulate it well, most of the troubles of trailer living are solved.  You no longer have as much of a limitation of space.  If you think back in the pre-McMansion era of Leave It To Beaver years, a typical starter home was 900 square feet or thereabouts.  The only reason people felt they needed more was because we turned into a consumer society and needed more room for disposable crap.  And we went from a unit that shared activities to each person needing their own space.  With multiple trailers and build-ons you get your own space even if junk accumulation is still problematic.  Two trailers twenty five feet long and a 16x16 lumber cabin joining them is 600 square feet.  Not a house by any means but more than adequate for a family wishing to be debt free.  As one who lives with a wife in less than 200 square feet, to me 600 would be wonderful.  Even with kids.  An added bonus is the whole unit isn’t as cold or uncomfortable as a single trailer. 
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Please support Bison by buying through the Amazon graphics above and to the right of each article.  Or, visit
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*
If you have two trailers, you are forming an “H”.  Two trailers side by side with the middle joining wood frame room.  Double wall, floor and ceiling it for superior insulation ( instead of building a single 2x4 wall, build two with the joints NOT lining up.  There is then no spot not covered by insulation, and heat won’t leak out ).  This is your living room/kitchen combo.  If most of you hang out there during the day there is little need to heat more than that one cube.  The trailers will get cold but for sleeping give everyone down comforters and wool blankets.  If you face the cube and the two trailer ends to the south, the heating will be reduced and the trailers will get some free heat to help them become habitable during the day in case someone wants to get some seclusion.  If you have three trailers ( you are buying them used as you find them cheap ) you make a “U” out of the trailers and fill in the inside with the wood frame room.  Again, face south.  The zoning police, if interested, can bust you for putting a wood burning stove in a travel trailer.  Federal law prohibits them.  If you care.  But placing one heater in the framed room keeps you Nanny State Compliant.  If you care.
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The most pimping house would be a cube, four trailers forming around an interior courtyard.  That would either be the wood frame room or even half narrow rooms forming a square with an open outdoor spot in the middle for BBQ’s or whatnot.  I know you are scratching your head wondering why a family needs four stoves, four fridges, four of everything an RV offers.  Especially if those functions are in the common room.  Just gut the trailers, leaving the beds and couches.  Store the appliances ( everyone gets their own toilet, as four small composting toilets are better than one big one ) and use as back-ups, or sell them to offset some of the trailer acquisition cost.  You are basically buying mobile weather proof containers with minimal insulation, not trying to form several separate households.    Food for thought.
END
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By the by, all my writing is copyrighted.  For the obtuse out there.
 

Tuesday, June 26, 2012

always prepared

ALWAYS PREPARED
Today I got to wondering, always a suspicious and dangerous activity and I should probably submit my anal cavity to TSA officers for a thorough investigation to ensure Homeland Security, what in the name of God I’ve accomplished in the last fifteen years preparing for the end of the world and what if anything I should be worried about doing in the near future.  If I’m honest with myself, the difference in that time period in my education is extreme.  Back in those days I still held the touchingly naïve view shared by legions of middle class idiots that are college educated that after a very short period of time, regardless of disaster whether it be asteroid strike or nuclear war or total grid melt down, the government would restore order and services and all would be peachy and hunky and we would all join hands together and give each other sloppy kisses and sing kumbiya and yes, Rodney, we all CAN get along.   So, at most a year supply of food was all that was needed and a few dozen boxes of ammo were sufficient.  I now realize that I was a friggin idiot and for someone who professes to love the study of history I was totally clueless about how it actually transpired and I really was in a bubble created by the public schools and the media in which only growth occurs and in general only good things happen to good people.  It wasn’t a conspiracy or the intention of evil people to blind us, it was reality as we ALL knew for the last 500 years.  Things like the Soviet mass famine by design and the Nazi genocide and The Killing Fields were of course real, but they just illustrated how Good won out over Very Bad People. 
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NEW Bison Blog CD For Sale
I've got an actual professional to archieve and format all the old blog on a CD-ROM.  I haven't got a copy of it yet, but I'm thinking this thing will be better than sliced white bread.   It does cost $10 plus shipping, figure another $4 or so, which might be a bit on the higher side.  But I think I'm worth it.  Depending on how much the production company charges per copy, my cut will be about $5 to $6.  That isn't too much to ask for over five years of work and nearly two million words of pure brilliance.  Here is the link to order:
http://kunaki.com/sales.asp?PID=PX00KX7Z1I
*
So, in the last fifteen years, I haven’t stockpiled a whole lot of new junk.  I went from one years supply of wheat for three people and one grinder to five years for two and three grinders.  I went from two rifles to five.  From five hundred rounds of ammo ( I think.  It might have been more since I remember a lot of gun shows in the 90’s in Oklahoma where S&B 303b was $6 a box ) to two grand plus reloading supplies.  I can now generate my own solar power and I own land, neither of which was true then.  Of course, I did move to Florida expressly because I thought the heat would go out in January 2000.  I could have lived without electricity, and in theory I wouldn’t have needed worry about no place to live ( the wife was living in her ex mother in laws condo ).  Thinking back at what my collapse stockpile was then and now, it hasn’t changed all that much.  Back then I had a cardboard box full of disposable propane canisters, now I have a half dozen five gallon tanks.  I might have had more canned meat then compared to now, but I’ve stockpiled a lot of beans now whereas then the cans were my only protein.  The only fundamental change is now I have land and more storage space ( well, I didn’t have precious metal coins back then, but that is far removed from necessities ). 
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Please support Bison by buying through the Amazon graphics above and to the right of each article.  Or, visit
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You can purchase anything, not just the linked item.  Enter Amazon through my item link and then go to whatever other item you desire.  As long as you don’t leave Amazon until after the order is placed, I get credit for your purchase.  Thank you.
*
Anything past a certain point of basic supplies is unnecessary.  I’ve had ample funds to improve my stockpile stash since Y2K ( remember all those good tip years at the casino? ) but I’ve seen little need to change the basics.  Grains and grinders, filters for water, bolt guns and ammo and shelter from the elements.  And just as I’ve seen little need to change those items, I also see little need to get anything else right now.  And need I really remind you?  NOW is the time we can all hear the thunder of the waterfall straight ahead.  We don’t know how far ahead it is, or how long it will be til we get there.  We do know we can’t get to the bank of the river to save ourselves, so the only course is to lash the gear down and hold on.  The other passengers, the other 99%, hear nothing and are standing by the railings chugging free cocktails.  They will be the first to fall overboard, being tipsy and not knowing they need to hang on or brace themselves.  But I feel little compulsion to rush out and buy any last minute supplies. 
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Unlike most Yuppie Scum Survivalists, I’m not always looking for the newest most expensive toy to safely steer me through the treacherous waters of poverty or discomfort.  I have basic food, shelter and protection stashed.  I feel comfortable about what could happen ( as far as supplies go.  Adaption is another matter ).  I’ll always add to the quantities of the basics.  That is a given.  But I also feel comfortable about my odds with what is already in place.  Which isn’t much different than fifteen years ago.  But the change I’m most happy with is the slow to grasp but priceless realization that when it all falls apart, so too does the fantasy of government help.  To say it was Katrina that opened my eyes might be too clichéd, but it is at least partly true.  Other disasters that met with incompetent response were also instrumental in my dawning awareness, but that one was probably the Big Deal.  After Katrina, the Gulf Spill and Fukashima and the 2008 Bank Meltdown, all were then predictable and of little shock.  Of course the government can’t help anymore.   Come collapse, we are so totally on our own.  Other governments will quickly take the place of our current one, but that is not the point.  The point is, our current rulers saving us has the same probability of happening as an ant twisting the testicles of an elephant. 
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I’m now prepared, for I have the priceless knowledge I’m on my own.  What white knight?  Once the current regime collapse, it’s back to medieval peasantry at best. 
END
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My books available at
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By the by, all my writing is copyrighted.  For the obtuse out there.
 

Monday, June 25, 2012

world ends tuesday next

WORLD ENDS TUESDAY NEXT
The title should have been, World Ends Tuesday Next And Recent Immigrants Crap A Bloody Stool Over American Free Capitalism Bald Face Lie, but that was too much to print twice.  Once above and once when I posted it to Blogger.  First, because I’ll make it short and sweet because it isn’t all about me, the immigrant piece.  NPR, where you can always hear the waterfall of gushing tears over the downtrodden and oppressed and the slurping of tongues as any liberal ( read: Communist ) politician is given a good anal bath in an effort to secure funding, had a short blurb in which a recent Jamaican immigrant had a hair extension business that wasn’t-horror!- licensed.   I love how her tragic plight was portrayed.  She starts a business, supports herself and supposedly others in her family that are too busy smoking weed and going to Marley tribute concerts to get a job ( because, really!  If those lazy slackers would just assume twenty grand in debt they could earn a degree and the jobs fairy would pull a wonderful paycheck out of her ass ).  Then, someone told her she needed to be licensed ( read: a competitor narcked on her to get her shut down ).  Boo-hoo!  It was going to cost her five grand to go to school to get certified.  News flash, freak.  America ain’t much better than any other crap hole Third World country when it comes to greasing the palm of The Man.  Here, it is just that you need to pay a lawyer to decipher hundreds of pages of legalese to decide who gets “fees, licenses, permissions”.  We don’t call them bribes, otherwise the rubes pretending to make a difference by “voting” ( read: pulling a lever on a computer that has the outcome already programmed into it ) would think we were living in a dictatorship instead of a “Democracy” ( read: above section on computers.  As an example of how we don’t even know what the concept means, the news reported Egyptian elections as the first democratic elections ever.  Yet, the military still holds power and the Presidente post is largely honorary.  Equivalent to the Queen in England.  Morons ).  Sorry you bought into the whole free market dream.  I hope you can get by on your looks.  And as an interesting side statistic, thirty years ago one in twenty workers needed a certification.  Today it is one in three.
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NEW Bison Blog CD For Sale
I've got an actual professional to archieve and format all the old blog on a CD-ROM.  I haven't got a copy of it yet, but I'm thinking this thing will be better than sliced white bread.   It does cost $10 plus shipping, figure another $4 or so, which might be a bit on the higher side.  But I think I'm worth it.  Depending on how much the production company charges per copy, my cut will be about $5 to $6.  That isn't too much to ask for over five years of work and nearly two million words of pure brilliance.  Here is the link to order:
http://kunaki.com/sales.asp?PID=PX00KX7Z1I
*
Friday, I got notice from a buddy that a trailer was for sale cheap.  Saturday I closed the deal on a $500 twenty five foot travel trailer.  Not much is wrong with it other than the puddle of brains staining the carpet as it was a suicide sale.  Nothing a razor knife and some bleach won’t fix ( and two pairs of gloves ).  I’m pretty happy about the whole thing even though it is too big to fit into the pit.  It will either be a guest house, a project trailer or a storage shed.  I might even move into it next year since there will be a lot less space to heat, but that’s up in the air.  Anyway, as I was wallowing in my good fortune I peddled home after laundry and stopped at the mailbox as per the usual routine.  And there was a letter from my bestest buddies in the whole wide world, Florida Child Support Enforcement.  I’m done, legally, finally.  No more child support.  And my next full paycheck is a week from tomorrow.  This is your official notice of the world ending.  I can’t see NOT getting screwed by all the gods, as their sense of humor runs towards humping with my mind. 
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To celebrate, I decided that we would go into town on Saturday and eat out.  I went to rent a car, but they were out so I got an SUV for the same price.  Sweet.  I can almost see how folks would fall for its alluring call of luxury.  That was one pimpin ride, yo.  And it even got 23 miles per gallon in town.  I splurged on a ten dollar steak plate and the wife on fried chicken ( yes, bitches, this is a “what I had for dinner last night” article ).  After the wife gambled on fifteen bucks I called it a day.  Even celebrating I can’t spend much past $125.  Well, I did buy a DVD.  I had wanted to watch “Animal House” again after about fifteen years.  Is it me, or did they used to have a rated PG version as well as the R one?  I swear I didn’t remember boobs when I saw it the first half dozen times.  I could be remembering poorly after almost thirty years, but I remember the shower scene from “Stripes” as if it were yesterday and I haven’t seen that one in about twenty years. 
*
Please support Bison by buying through the Amazon graphics above and to the right of each article.  Or, visit
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You can purchase anything, not just the linked item.  Enter Amazon through my item link and then go to whatever other item you desire.  As long as you don’t leave Amazon until after the order is placed, I get credit for your purchase.  Thank you.
*
Well, that was all fun and games for Saturday.  Then, I come into work today and there is another buddy trying to sell a beat to crap cab over trailer.  He hauled it away as a favor to a neighbor ( the thing has interior wall leaks and the cab over part is falling forwards ) and wants it off his work trailer.  So I got it for a hundred bucks.  Folks, this worries the heck out of me.  I’m getting too many instances of good luck thrown my way.  When does the other shoe drop?  Granted, I had been due Florida releasing my obligation last month.   I look at it as good news they didn’t screw me more.  And, coming into bargains naturally follows starting to socialize and networking.  But I’m also always leery of good fortune.  I’m telling you, the world ends Tuesday next.
END
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By the by, all my writing is copyrighted.  For the obtuse out there.
 

Friday, June 22, 2012

backing up the best

BACKING UP THE BEST
Before we start today, I decided to be nice and go with a G rated joke.  Well, okay, perhaps it’s a PG rating if you feel like you need to insulate your spawn from reality.  You know, because it works out so well as they grow up.  But let’s say you want to shield your child from the reality of death.  I had pets dying at an early age, left and right getting hit by cars or whatnot.  As a result to me death is just normal.  Although I might be a bit TOO callus, refusing to go to my grandmothers funeral and not giving her passing a second thought other than making jokes about it ( “you move slower than my grandma, and she’s been decomposing X number of years” ).  I guess I’m pretty good at compartmentalizing.  Anyway, perhaps you don’t want to raise an uncaring unfeeling little bastard, so be wary about telling this joke which humorizes death.  A man goes into a vet and wants to know if his beloved companion of many years is actually dead.  He can’t accept it.  The vet offers a test to make sure, calling in his Labrador Retriever who walks around the corpse and sniffs it.  The dog frowns and shakes his head and the vet pronounces a dead verdict.  Still not wanting to accept this, the man demands a second opinion.  The vet calls in his cat who circles the corpse, smells it, hisses at the vet and runs away.  The vet pronounces the deceased verdict.  Finally, the man knows his pet is dead and asks the vet how much he owes for the visit.  No charge from me, says the vet, but there will be a charge for the Lab work and the CAT scan.
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Visiting everybody’s favorite Yuppie Survivalist site, one soon runs into the motto “two is one, one is none”.  It makes perfect sense, and is just another extension of the Boy Scout Motto ( which used to be, Be Prepared, but recently has turned to, Don’t Let The Scout Master Sleep With You In Your Tent ).  You need a back up of everything, and preferably a back up of a back up.  But like all good theories, it runs into problems when the rubber hits the road.  First you start with your house, stocked with a trophy wife from back when you needed a BMW and Brooks Brothers suits to impress the boss.  The wife was another “look at me” accessory.  The house is half a mil, the wife at least that much over her lifetime ( trophy wives are what skews the national average for the number of times a married couple has sex.  The average redneck couple probably copulate several times a week.  There is an actual incentive to please your mate tying into the lack of perception that you are friggin princess, plus a need for two part time incomes to pay off the mobile home.  A  Barbie Doll wife gives it up maybe once a month.  She holds all the cards in that she will rack you financially at will.  So you pour money her way without much compensation.  And you wonder where I get my loathing of Yuppies ).
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You each have a car.  College tuitions and credit cards.  Medical insurance.  All told, you are going broke making eighty grand a year.  Now, start to add in a retreat.  A bug out vehicle.  Food storage in number ten cans.  An arsenal of semi-auto’s with palletized ammunition supplies.  Night vision and other military toys.  Let’s be nice and assume a low ball of a hundred grand.  You are financing a house at two grand a month, two cars for another grand, the insurance at $500 and at least another $500 for wife expenses.  Four grand a month.  I’d say that if you aren’t pouring in another thousand in preps, nothing concrete is getting done ( remember, this in keeping with Only The Best ).  Now you are broke near the hundred thousand dollar salary.  Now, let’s add in the Back Up costs.  Another retreat, perhaps in another country.  Multiple bank accounts, another bug out vehicle.  Stockpiles buried elsewhere.  When the least expensive piece of equipment is a $800 handgun ( oh, sorry, a $1500 handgun after magazines, holsters, laser pointers, spare part kits and ammo ), and the next is a two thousand dollar “We Own The Night!!!!!” vision goggle, backing up everything gets mighty expensive.  Corporate CEO type expensive. 
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If you seriously expect me to believe that the average reader of Rawles can pull a cool million out of his ass for a middle class house and car, a middle class wife and a middle class Yuppie Survivalist wet dream, you are a darn fool.  Even at a hundred thousand a year, you only take home about seventy grand.  Sixty of that is basic expenses.   The average prepper doesn’t spend ten grand a year, but even so you need twenty years to achieve a desired luxurious lifestyle after the collapse.  Granted, in the 70’s contraction, who knew we had another two score years left?  Not many.  Of course, we also had the possibility of nuclear war, so back then as now, it still paid to be ready for no tomorrow.  Calling for twenty years of prepping is to ignore the whole reasoning behind prepping, and to be little more than a hawker of adult toys feeding another type of fantasy.  Nothing wrong with fantasy.  I love to escape into history.  But when fantasy becomes your reality it can be a bit problematic.  And, disclaimer, Rawles provides a needed service and I don’t blame him for all the ills of the survivalist movement.  That started long before he was around.  I blame people for not being able to glean from many different sources and decide a realistic path for themselves.  Hey, you all have a splendid weekend.  I might have an inside track on a cheap used trailer.  I’ll know in a day or two.  This might be a much cheaper path to The Bison Pit Of Doom.
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