Monday, August 27, 2012

alien space bats

Before we begin today talking about doomster mindsets, another disparaging word on everybody’s favorite bovine excrement artist, Rush.  I won’t say I’m smarter than everybody else.  In years far past I was an avid listener and fan.  Alas, I’ve grown and tried to think outside of past boxes ( whether they be unthinking patriotism, irrational free market capitalism or other blinders ) and slowly my enthusiasm dwindled.  We’ve opined here before on Rush’s many faults and I won’t kick a fat and deaf man when he’s down ( well, not this time.  I’m sure there are many times it would be advantageous to kick an obese clown when he’s defenseless.  Goebbels comes to mind ).  Rush’s newest thing is to mock Obammy when he says anything about American imperialism.  Now, sorry to piss on anyone’s parade, but when you have military bases in over a hundred countries, chances are you are an empire.  And Empires collect tribute.  It’s a historical constant.  By calling Obammy on this, Rush is calling anyone who points to the truth a democrat ( and worse ).  Guilt by association for parallel lines of thinking.  Really, Rush?  We can’t just speak the truth?  Are we in that much denial?  Nothing wrong with exploiting foreigners.  There is a lot wrong with lying to ourselves about it.  Enough of that.  Anyone heard of the Venezuela refinery fire?  I saw a Saturday night blurb on broadcast news.  It lasted a whole 30 seconds, no details, and then the idiots were off to gush about the GOP convention as if that mattered at all.  They said that the refinery was the largest in the world.  Add the Gulf Of Mexico shut down of hundreds of rigs.  Higher gas prices, anyone?
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I love the novel “Dies The Fire”.  The cause of collapse was never very detailed, and there was little need.  It wouldn’t have held up under scrutiny anyway.  One of the characters was joking about the cause being Alien Space Bats ( or was it the authors description of the inspiration for the story?  I can’t remember.  I’ll have to read it again soon ).  I love that turn of phrase.  Most of the time, I just say “when the Apocalypse happens” but sometimes I like “when alien space bats attack”.  When I’m with company that I don’t want to spook it is “zombie apocalypse”.  The point today is that I think about the Apocalypse almost as much as I think about sex.  I’m always seeing alien space bats under every rock ( to borrow from the mocking “he sees a communist under every rock” ).  I used to be normal and gave the collapse of western civilization only a few thoughts a day.  I had the old school one years supply of food and I was armed.  It seemed to be enough.  Then, something happened.  I think it was from reading one too many Peak Oil books.  One day, I started seriously questioning the limited preparations I had made.  Oh, it started longer than that, before Y2K.  About 1997 I started consciously making life decisions based on an upcoming catastrophe.  It determined where I lived, the job I worked ( for extra money ) and etc.  But it wasn’t until 2005 or 2006 that I took a long hard look at the things I was prepping for.  Prior to that, I was prepping for disruption.  After that, I was prepping for collapse. 
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I don’t think it is quite normal, always fixated on collapse.  Well, neither is sex.  You act quite the fool and spend quite the chunk of change.  But, hey, what can you do?  Guys are just walking sperm banks, captives to our hormones.  So, compared to that, really, how bad is an anal Apocalypse fixation?  But always placing every decision in the context of collapse does make life both easier and a lot more interesting.  And I’m not just funning here, exacerbating for comedic effect.  I’m talking a trip to Wal-Mart is a survivalist think tank exercise.  I’ll be buying everything, and I mean everything, with the Apocalypse in mind.  I have ten bucks left over from the food budget.  Should I save it ( rainy day )?  No, got to think of hyperinflation.  Also, roving bands of looters if I put it under the mattress.  Buy more food?  No, their food doesn’t last long enough ( years instead of decades ).  Coffee?  God, where do I put it?  I’ve got at least six years worth already.  I got it- pants!  I don’t have enough stockpiled.  Which pair lasts longest?  Then, going home, always fill the gas tank ( back when I still drove )!  We’re down 20%!!!!!  If biking, think about upcoming maintenance.  Always a balancing act between prematurely spending money that could go to other supplies ( side ponder for what kinds ) but not spending it soon enough and the apocalypse starts and your tires are 50% gone on tread.
Then, next time this chain of reasoning starts, you have another item to factor in.  Now, you have another pair of pants.  Time to get more underwear?  Do you have enough?  How long will they last?  Should you get another brick of .22’s instead?  How much do you have again?  Crap, can’t remember!  Should I search through the storage van again?  While I’m there, I could reorganize and make more room.  But, do I want to take the time away from reading about the decline of XXX ( fill in current historical poster child of collapse )?  And, should I be reading about yet another society collapsing?  Should I be reading some anthropology?  Never mind, I already know it all comes down to how we can feed ourselves.  Do I need more rimfire?  Shouldn’t I get another rimfire rifle?  What if my other one breaks? 
And on and on it goes, every day.  Yeh, I got too much time on my hands.  An hour and a half commute, lots of driving for work.  Lots of tuning out the wife at home.  But, hey, if the collapse is already underway, is it really obsessive behavior?
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  1. I have decided that when the downfall of civilization occurs, I will drink up my remaining bourbon and just fucking die! No preps, no stockpiling, no stress, Just the glorious peaceful darkness and quiet of oblivion. ahhhhh! your friend , the rat

    1. I give a lot of thought to surviving, and a lot of effort. Hence, I'll be one of the first to die. You, no planning, will be forced to survive. The Fates are wicked indeed. Enjoy the Apocalypse, sucker!!!

  2. learn to harvest natural fiber, weave it into canvas pants and shirts

    make your own gunpowder and homemade powder rifle from gas pipe

    find what herbs and other medicals you can cultivate

    ever make "chickory coffee"?

    ever tried to live simiplier and easier?

    if you can't or won't do cheeer up

    as you go to hell


  3. James, if you are thinking about what you are losing, then yes, it is a sick obsessive behaviour. You need to have a positive vision of the future you want. Mine is so strong that I find the collapse of industrial civilization to be convenient. If it weren't happening already I would need to engineer it to fulfill my vision.

  4. So lemme get this straight - no alien space bats to be had ? Shit!!! I hear they taste great in finger sandwiches . . .

    Anything we have stocked up only delays the inevitable empty locker, sooner or later is going to be some hunger, disease or other conflicts with people.